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Joke of the Day via SPAM

I hate spam. We try to avoid it, we install software that attempts to block it, we try and prevent our e-mail address from being posted on public web sites where they can be collected by spammers. Spammers are all saying the same thing; "enlarge this", "refinance here", "blah blah blah". And since they are all saying the same thing, they have to include random text in their spam messages to try and make it seem different enough from previously identified spam to pass detection methods.
Here is an example of pure random nonsense included in the body of a spam I received:

eigenspace sailor deign belvedere croft graceful puffball dance transect charm everyman blake lute imminent apportion cathedra pry syrup sadie ethnic limelight


Or the lengthy:

Krivalry access informal brushwork faustus carton discretion grassy phyllis ;Hpolytypy employ flick lossy gorky mythic incidental bashaw discoid aeneas novosibirsk adaptation psalter raceway veneer minstrelsy fragile anxiety trinitarian spooky celibacy sonora dream unison addressee planoconcave northrop withheld ,Scolumbine diaphragm convergent avery aspirant emphatic edify integral creche wholesome ballroom expansion mediocre chemist additional whitehead 'Lthetis track oblivion arhat avowal sidestep conscious akron ,Uheadstand cessna dogtrot amicable delphine adage husbandmen amber askance operetta synonymy chattel amygdaloid wigging diploid brookhaven episode !Odescendant johannes agate plagiarist mercuric glyph olympia sault contrary fray agave bismuth bridgehead hubert weather pelham bull wildfire brad opponent vigilant gorilla allegory awesome blew commit ;Gcouple trenchermen flagstone phyla potentiometer stateroom decoy influx huston macarthur over purveyor classmate bratwurst creaky conferred 'Gafford aerobacter cecilia adam garnet newspapermen tarnish ghostly deceive energy engel danger northrop avocado chenille dolan stick crosshatch holmium mardi belgian chum stowage .Bbizet dell ascription beta imperfect ambivalent crescent hankel balloon guenther orgasm applejack grovel jetliner bustard expansive perfidy amputee appear meadowland pent albania docket fully hadrian crandall antennae crosslink mcnulty spiro ,Vcollet allegro beef pratt screech electroencephalogram hendrickson kingdom subversive aphrodite tetrahedron abscess escort anaplasmosis bastion noll atlantes aunt fore boxcar mimetic ;Ptnt chamber scythe beaumont pageant wildcat carbone filamentary kilgore sahara cheat scour crosswise built ashley dope biochemic .Xinstead writ restaurateur resonant tantrum brutal bartlett utterance askance mount scrotum primacy downfall upturn seven indoeuropean .Bmartensite congener slate emulsion mauve spun whoever babcock budd away symbiosis darkle urbana ,Wtunic unix geometer lionel emerge aggressive detect dove dilogarithm indissoluble concrete delicti luminescent lorenz neglecter time althea category decade thundershower .Iwatanabe conceptual eyelash rifle traceable dailey bennett ordinance shuck colossi extinguish tuition devour cabinetry crunch sheathe pier simon collard cigar sterile centimeter ,Nburrow minuscule impolite cocoa premise tuna bylaw drizzle hue mushroom clifford magnitude handspike lipid argonne freak promiscuity transcription precocity screwdriver befitting heal division atlantes noteworthy poseidon bloodhound berra .Vjudge dissuade grille ernst appearance citizenry velar tablespoonful incinerate shawl radius berenices aesthete proportionate virgil bedford apparent marina 'Qclairvoyant mafia banter propeller causate pottery commute pliable marquee anteroom credent 'Igrub indifferent flea nomogram debugger sutherland spaulding barter berg peppy cation hidalgo herr sneak compare !

Here is ASCII art that was included in the body... warning, this art depicts a nude female person. Click here to view.
And then here is a "Joke of the Day" included in the body:

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman. "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time; haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?" "Because that's a microwave," he replied.

I can't wait for the day when there is a widely adopted method between mail servers to authenticate e-mails and allow/deny delivery. Spam is such a huge problem; ISPs want to stop it so their bandwidth won't get eaten up. But spammers won't stop because it's profitable. I heard that last year over 20 million dollars was spent on product/services from spam. Why do people support these spammers!

User Comments

Thursday, August 12th 2004
Spam is the reason I don't give me email to anyone. That said, I get relatively few spam emails...
20 million last year? Bloody 'ell, don't people delete spam before reading?
Friday, August 13th 2004
Well it's pretty simple, really....only open the emails that you are expecting, especially if there are attachments included. Just delete them and move on with your already busy lifes. If I sat there and read all the spam that I get I would lose many hours a day, and it is all bogus material like Erik said...Obviously people don't know who I am (or that I am male) if they are sending me SPAM with the subject heading being : BIKINI TOUCH - LOOK GOOD IN YOUR BIKINI DOWN THERE!! uh, no thanks I don't wear bikinis, speedos or anything else that hugs me that tight.
Monday, August 16th 2004

Joke 1:
A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blond joke?" The man says back to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blond. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he is blond. The bouncer is blond. The man sitting over to your left is also blond. Still wanna tell that blond joke?" The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."

Joke 2:
Two blondes are walking in the forest when they come across marks in the ground. One says to another, 'Oh, look at the deer tracks!''Those aren't deer trucks, you dumb blonde!' says the other. 'They're bear prints.''Deer tracks, you dumb blonde!''Bear prints, you dumb blonde!'Next day's headlines : Two blondes killed by train in forest.

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